Author Archives: ivan zlax

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erisian time

Back in the old days, the world was on many conflicting systems of keeping time. While three-quarters time might prevail in one area, elsewhere it was spare time or springtime or due time or ragtime.
Exactly 136 years ago a bunch of pundits from all over the world met in Washington, DC, and decided everyone should employ Standard Time (used by Standard Oil of New Jersey), based on Greenwich Mean Time (the time I was using in the meantime in Greenwich Village).
Far from perfect, this solution allows it to be one time in London at the exact moment it is some other time entirely in New York or San Francisco or Moscow.

Today, on this Daytime holiday, in coordination with Pope Crestomanci and the consensual decision of other respected Popes and Bishops of the New and Old World, we present the exact Erisian (Discordian) time. Discordian time is a single planetary decimal time. If in Christian time, the clock shows the correct time only in Greenwich Village and surroundings, then Erisian time on the whole planet is the same, that is, in some places the dawn is usually at 1 o’clock, while in the opposite side of the world it is at 6 o’clock. With this the beginning of Discordian day (0 hours, 0 minutes, 0 seconds) coincides with the beginning of Christian day on Easter Island on winter time (GMT-5). This means that the Erisian day starts 5 Christian hours later than the day in London (UTC ± 0:00).

As in the original decimal time system, there is 10 hours, 100 minutes in an hour, 100 seconds in a minute in a Discordian day. 10 hours per day – exactly as many fingers on both hands, without all these 12 apostles and 12 tribes.

1 Erisian hour = 0.1 days = 2.4 Christian hours
1 Erisian minute = 0.001 day = 1.44 Christian minute
1 Erisian second = 0.00001 day = 0.864 Christian second

In general, Discordian time coincides with the traditional decimal time (previously officially used in France and China), with a slight difference that Erisian time is the same for the whole planet, it has no time zones and is used within Discordian calendar.
At this address you can find out the exact discordinian time and date right now:

The source code for calculating time in javascript is published here:

ODD# V(a)/1,i;72Chs3186

basis of conquest/colonial/capitalist pr

Conquest, Colonialism, Сapitalism are all collective forms of interaction between one group of people and another. Such forms of group interaction become available due to the organization and collective actions of many different people with different interests, when they start to act for a common goal (family, tribal, class etc.)

A common language is not enough for the success of such collective forms of activity; such forms of domination of some people over others meet with natural counteraction. A common social philosophy or ideology is required to justify the advantages of some groups over others. Thanks to the introduction of the Prussian educational standard of education in most civilized countries of the world, the social philosophy of Darwinism has been instilled for several generations already, through a 10-year regime from bell to bell during puberty. Various national and class theories of Social Darwinism boil down to the fact that they proclaim struggle for existence, natural selection (survival of the fittest) and competition as the most important factors of evolution.

The postulates of Social Darwinism are well grounded in the social sciences. But Darwinism itself was initially poorly grounded in the natural sciences and even rejected by academies, after confirmation of Gregor Johann Mendel’s discoveries about genetic inheritance. In order to preserve the authority of Darwinism and its influence on the social sciences, academicians developed a synthetic theory of evolution. It is extremely important for the academic community to maintain this dilapidated evolutionary foundation, since all academicians without exception are fittest in the competition for academic titles, and the academic hierarchy is based on Social Darwinism.

But meanwhile, the evolutionary model of Kropotkin has long been known in the non-academic natural-scientific scholar community: Mutual Aid – A Factor of Evolution. This evolutionary theory, published 117 years ago, is well grounded, threre are many examples of stable and thriving populations prone to intraspecific and, especially, interspecific mutual aid. Animal and human examples demonstrate the advantages of mutual aid over primitive natural selection (at the time of publication, Darwinism had not yet been disproved by discoveries in the field of inheritance):

Although Social Kropotkinism potentially level out academic, national and other authorities based on Social Darwinism, Kropotkin’s very model of evolution is the most scientifically sound theoretical basis for describing current biological diversity.

ODD# V(a)/2,iv;9Afm3185

happy gonkulator day

I’d like to make a public statement. I was fooled. I bought the PR, believing in advertising. I admit my mistake, which i realized only now.

Previously, i translated all the sites i administer into https, because ‘s’ at the end means “secure”. That’s probably the reason of  success of this campaign: “Make all your sites secure”.
Yes, a https session can and should be used for personal correspondence on unsafe networks, but it is not necessary to view pictures on social networks with https (as popular browsers force users to do, showing “secure” and “insecure” depending on the presence of https/http pictures). I understood this at the beginning of using it, but being fooled, i was continued to fool myself in the spirit of “well, after all, an unscrupulous provider can find out what particular pictures are viewed by users”. And that’s why, giving in to the corporate PR, i did compulsory redirection to https on all sites. Even when i saw how many trackers are inserted into sites of the corporations that are concerned about security and promoting this protocol.

But in preparation for today’s holiday, i realized that all this is nonsense compared to what loads the https protocol imposes on the global digital infrastructure. Not only a servers encrypt each request before it is sent, but a clients also use additional resource consumption to decrypt the data they receive. This imaginary security concern leads to increased demand for power consumption and computing on a global scale. This imaginary security concern leads to faster and more frequent battery discharge, where when viewing friends’ feeds, the mobile device only does what encrypts and decrypts images and short publicly available text messages. In fact, this creates a demand for energy and computing power.

I am not going to give up this protocol where it is justified (for example, in the private correspondences). But where there is no need in it, i will try to remove the obligatory https redirect, which i did after being fooled. Literally, i was fooled by browsers showed such sites as “unsafe” when opening new tabs.

First of all, i removed the redirect of these sites right now; they are again available via HTTP protocol, which does not create additional loads and power consumption, and does not increase the additional demand for energy carriers:

Gradually, i will try to fix this mistake and reduce to a minimum my personal involvement in what provokes an increase in useless energy consumption on a global scale.

ODD# V(d)/1,ii;59Brc3185

saint mammes day

Using my apostolic authority, on this day i rank in concord Greek Orthodox Saint Mammes among the Erisian Saints. Now Mammes is twice a saint (in two religions), and this day is the 39th of Bureaucracy of the Erisian calendar and the 2nd of September of the Julian calendar, from now on it is twice the day of St. Mammes.

Commemorating the Life and Memory of Erisian and Greek Orthodox Mammes, twice canonized.

Mammes, a Cypriot hermit, lived by raising sheep, grazing goats and growing grapes. He did not pay any taxes. The Roman viceroy was angry at a shepherd who did not observe financial discipline, and sent soldiers after him. When the soldiers led the violator to the viceroy, a huge lion ran out of the forest, escaping from the circus. The soldiers, frightened, fled, and Mammes with a single movement of his hand tamed the lion and ridden on him to the viceroy. The astonished Roman freed Mammes from all taxes and duties. Since then, this saint has been the patron saint of animals and tax evaders. Continue reading